Will You Marry Me?
Estimated reading time: 10 minutes, 16 secondsHomeward Bound
“I am so glad to have met you, Jan. I am so happy for both of you,” said Charlotte as we stood in front of the Plaza Hotel. We stood holding hands as she walked into the hotel. We all hugged and said our farewells.
We started walking south on 5th Avenue which was not the direction we needed to get the subway to either of our apartments.
We chatted about the conversation with Charlotte for a few blocks, not my marriage announcement.
I did everything possible to avoid the marriage topic until we got home. I didn’t want to lose Jan.
After crossing 57th Street, Jan stopped and moved away from the pedestrians on the sidewalk.
Is she about to tell me she does not want to marry me? Is she going to break up with me?
“With my school job, we need to pick a date for the wedding that will not conflict,” Jan stated as she pulled her calendar out of her purse.
Did she say we needed to pick a date for our wedding?
How about the second week of August,” Jan asked.
She wants to marry me! We are going to get married! We will be on our honeymoon!
“It works for me!”
We hugged and kissed. Tears of joy rolled down my cheeks.
I love you; I love you!” I shouted as I danced on Fifth Avenue.
When we continued walking, Jan said, “We will have to look for an apartment in the Spring.
I smiled at her. The thought that we would soon begin our lives together forever made my tears flow like Niagara Falls.
Jan’s Three Commitments
We all have choices in our lives that can change us for better or worse, depending on how we decide. Jan had three opportunities to confirm our love for each other, and each time she selected me!
I have written about how we met in several posts.
Jan Clears the Decks is the first to clarify Jan’s commitment to me despite concerns from friends. I plan to write more about this period.
This post is the first to discuss the wedding. Over the next thirteen months, Jan faced many more moments when she could have chosen not to proceed.
My overall goal is to fully tell the story of each of Jan’s three commitments to me.
- Jan had two boyfriends when we met, and she ended those on the first day. The first was the day we met. She could have chosen not to fall in love with me. Many of her friends and family opposed our relationship. This post is the first to reference the options she had explicitly.
- This post is about telling our parents the concerns of her friends and family. We had roadblocks and a delayed planning timeframe.
- The last was a problematic situation early in our marriage. I will always be grateful that Jan stayed with me.
This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial 4.0 International License.
After almost 48 years, I recently lost my wife, Jan Lilien. Like The Little Prince, Jan and I believed that “The most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or touched, they are felt with the heart.” This blog is a collection of my random thoughts on love, grief, life, and all things considered.
These are lovely, Richard. Thank you for sharing. What a wonderful way to bring a smile to you and everyone.
Jodi, thank you so very much for sharing your comment on this post. I appreciate your friendship and support.
My writings are from my heart and, in many ways, are an extended love letter to Jan. As I have described in other posts and comments, the words flow from me like an incoming tide at the Jersey shore.
They fill pages and pages with memories that I then edit before sharing. Writing about Jan, Love, life, and grief helped me during this difficult time. Love never dies.
I have always liked Viktor E. Frankl’s quote in Man’s Search for Meaning.
I hope to see you on April 24th to Celebrate Jan Day.
Thanks so very much for reading this post. Please feel free to share this post and others.