Honeymoon Camping!

Estimated reading time: 15 minutes, 19 seconds

First Light of Morning

Without my watch, I did not know what time it was as if it mattered. After several hours, the storm became only steady rain. I could hear Jan sleeping in my nook. I was so happy that we were married and would have thousands of nights sleeping next to each other. Although I do not remember sleeping, I know I must have. 

Sunlight began filling the tent, and I slowly dressed and slipped out. 

A large tree had fallen no more than fifty feet to the left of our tent. Had it fallen in our direction, we probably would not have survived.

The trenches had kept the water away from the tent. However, fresh, deep gullies showed where the water had flowed freely around us. 

I had prepared for the storm and placed dry wood in the car. I gathered it and started a fire to make breakfast, especially coffee, for the love of my life. 

Wow, the storm was worse than I thought,” said Jan as she came out of the tent. 

“Yes, we were lucky. The water is heating up for your coffee.

Jan smiled at me as she pulled on her boots. 

Full sunshine was beginning to dry out the campsite as we finished breakfast.

What do you want to do before we drive to the Promised Land,” I asked Jan.

We had only planned to stay one night on the NJ side of the Delaware Water Gap. Our next stop was the Promised Land State Park. I had been there on my hostel trips. It had a lovely lake and hiking trails. Jan thought it was an ideal place for us to go on our honeymoon.

“It may take a few hours for the tent to fully dry; maybe we can take a hike?”

I nodded affirmatively and quickly got ready for a morning hike.

A Photo from My Sweetheart

When we reached the road, we had two choices of trails. One was four miles and looped back to the point of beginning. For the other one, we would have had to walk as far as we wanted and then return the same way. Let’s take the trail that will bring us back here,” Jan suggested. 

The trail was a little muddy from the rain, but our boots were dry, and the walk was more leisurely than expected. 

“Look,” I said as I pointed to an Eagle flying over us. 

Can you get a photo?”

“I will do my best.”

The trail was full of wildlife and flowers. We frequently stopped to take photos. 

Close to the halfway point, we saw a fire lookout station. It was made of wood and stood thirty-five to forty feet in the air. 

“Let’s climb to the top. We should be able to get some great photos.”

I let Jan go first and followed her up the stairs. 

“Wow, Jan, this is a great view.”

We hugged each other as we looked around at the forest and the river.

Do you have any film in the camera,” Jan inquired.

“Yes, one or two photos left. We have more film in the car.”

“Can you take a photo of me?”

“Yes, my love, I am happy to take a photo of my lovely bride.”

I held the camera and started to frame the photo.

“I am not ready yet.”

“If you stand on this side, we can get a perfect photo.”

I turned to look at Jan to see if she concurred. 

She was pulling her shirt over her head. 

Unless you have a problem, I want you to take a photo of me bare-chested,” Jan stated as she unhooked her bra.

“I’m OK if that is what you want,” I said, astonished.

I am twenty-five and have always wanted a photo of my breasts. I am not getting any younger, and one day, my boobs will sag even more. Whenever I was with someone and thought of taking a photo, I decided not to because I could not trust what they would do with a photo of me sans my shirt and bra. I love you and trust you. Plus, it might be nice for you to have a photo to remind you of me if I am away.

Standing only feet away on the lookout tower, I was aroused and in complete agreement.

Jan leaned on the floor with her right hand holding her head. Her left hand with the ring I had given her two and one-half days ago when we wed was on her hip. 

I was not a good photographer, but I took my time on this one to ensure that it would be what she wanted. 

Finally, I took the photo.

“I think my eyes were closed.”

I held the camera and took another photo, but no film was left. 

“There is no more film.”

“That’s OK. Will you still love me when my boobs hang below my belly button?”

“I will always love you.”

“Me too. But I worry you will change your mind if they sag too much.

“Jan, nothing will ever stop me from loving you. I love you because you are who you are, not your body. We share each other’s souls and are bound together forever.”

I put the camera down and walked over and kissed and caressed Jan.

I know the storm interrupted our plans last night, but I am not sure a wooden floor would work for either of us. Splinters might deflate the pleasure.”

“I agree. That would not be the way to start our married life.”

“As long as we are on the lookout tower, I do not see any reason to put my bra or shirt on unless you want me to.”

Blushing, I said, “I am quite happy with how you are dressed.

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Conjure Women

Read: November 2021

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Conjure Women: A Novel

by Afia Atakora

Conjure Women by Afia Atakora is about a mother and her daughter with a shared talent for healing—and for the conjuring of curses — at the heart of this dazzling first novel. Conjure Women takes place before, during, and after the Civil War. The book is structured around three-time frames; Slaverytime, Freddomtime, and Wartime.

Having grown up in the South and heard far too many stories about the Lost Cause, it was a joy to read a book narrated by two African-American women. The third leading character is the daughter o the owner of the plantation. At the end of the war, she was hidden away for six years and was unaware the South had surrendered.

Conjure Women is a sweeping story that brings the world of the South before and after the Civil War vividly to life. Spanning eras and generations, it tells of the lives of three unforgettable women: Miss May Belle, a wise healing woman; her precocious and observant daughter Rue, who is reluctant to follow in her mother’s footsteps as a midwife; and their master’s daughter Varina. The secrets and bonds among these women and their community come to a head at the beginning of a war and at the birth of an accursed child, who sets the townspeople alight with fear and a spreading superstition that threatens their newly won, tenuous freedom.

Magnificently written, brilliantly researched, and richly imagined, Conjure Women moves back and forth in time to tell the haunting story of Rue, Varina, and May Belle, their passions and friendships, and the lengths they will go to save themselves and those they love.

Since Jan died, I have read many books that I know she enjoyed. We both enjoyed Call the Midwife, and this book focused on birthing and mothering. Although conjuring was their medical care and not the type practiced in poplar by the Midwives, we would both have enjoyed the book.

Conjure Women also raises questions about the meaning of freedom. For example, Rue chooses not to leave the former plantation after the Klan attacks despite being free.

I recommend this book and look forward to reading more from Afia Atakora.

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A Matter of Death and Life

Read: December 2024

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A Matter of Death and Life

by Irvin D. Yalom and Marilyn Yalom

Today, I embarked on an emotional journey with “A Matter of Death and Life” by Irvin D. Yalom and Marilyn Yalom. This poignant narrative follows the renowned psychiatrist and his talented writer wife as they navigate a year filled with profound reflection following her terminal diagnosis. I received this thoughtful gift from my son Mike and his family, which makes it all the more special.

As the year winds down, I’m excited to say that this will be the final book I dive into in 2024 and will also mark the beginning of my reading adventures in 2025! Irwin and Marylin Yalom‘s exploration of love and living without regret is touching and inspiring, reminding me of the journey my wife and I took after her diagnosis of lymphoma in August 2019.

Irvin Yalom, an internationally acclaimed psychiatrist and author, dedicated his career to counseling those suffering from anxiety and grief. However, he had never faced the need to counsel himself until his wife, the esteemed feminist author Marilyn Yalom, was diagnosed with cancer. In A Matter of Death and Life,” the Yaloms share how they confronted profound new struggles: Marilyn aimed to die a good death, while Irv sought to continue living without her.

Through alternating accounts of their last months together and Irv’s first months alone, they provide a rare window into facing mortality and coping with the loss of a beloved partner. The Yaloms enjoyed a loving family, a home in Palo Alto under a magnificent valley oak, a large circle of friends, avid readers worldwide, and a long, fulfilling marriage. Yet, they faced death, as we all do. With the wisdom acquired over two lifetimes and the familiar warmth of teenage sweethearts who grew up together, they explore universal questions of intimacy, love, and grief.

Informed by their extensive life experiences, “A Matter of Death and Life” is an open-hearted offering to anyone seeking support, solace, and a meaningful life.



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Land of Milk and Honey: A Novel

Read: October 2023

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Land of Milk and Honey: A Novel

by C Pam Zhang

Today, I commenced reading Land of Milk and Honey: A Novel by C Pam Zhang, the award-winning author of How Much of These Hills Is Gold; she returns with a rapturous and revelatory novel about a young chef whose discovery of pleasure alters her life and, indirectly, the world. With the arrival of forest fire smoke in my neighborhood, it seemed a timely book to read.

A smog has spread. Food crops are rapidly disappearing. A chef escapes her dying career in a dreary city to take a job at a decadent mountaintop colony seemingly free of the world’s troubles.

There, the sky is clear again. Rare ingredients abound. Her enigmatic employer and his visionary daughter have built a lush new life for the global eliteZhan, one that reawakens the chef to the pleasures of taste, touch, and her body.

The chef’s boundaries undergo a thrilling erosion in this atmosphere of hidden wonders and cool, seductive violence. Soon, she is pushed to the center of a startling attempt to reshape the world far beyond the plate.

Sensuous and surprising, joyous and bitingly sharp, told in language as alluring as it is original, Land of Milk and Honey provocatively bare the ethics of seeking pleasure in a dying world. It is a daringly imaginative exploration of desire and deception, privilege and faith, and the roles we play to survive. Most of all, it is a love letter to food, wild delight, and the transformative power of a woman embracing her own appetite.


The Jan Lilien Education Fund sponsors ongoing sustainability and environmental awareness programs. Gifts made this month; I will match dollar-for-dollar. All donations are tax-deductible.

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Berlin- A Novel

Read: June 2023

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Berlin: A Novel by Bea Setton

by Bea Setton

I’ve begun reading Berlin: A Novel by Bea Setton. After finishing Kairos, a book set in a divided Berlin, Setton’s debut novel is witty and insightful, with a young woman battling a sense of emptiness who moves to Berlin for a fresh start. However, things go differently than planned.

Daphne, the protagonist, moves to Berlin hoping for a new beginning but deals with more drama than she left behind. She knows she needs to make friends, learn German, and navigate a new way of life. She even expects to spend long nights alone with Nutella and experience the difficulties of online dating in another language. But one night, something unexpected and unnerving happens in her apartment, and Daphne’s life suddenly turns dangerous.

Setton captures the modern female experience with sharp observations and wit, making Berlin a must-read for her generation.


The Jan Lilien Education Fund sponsors ongoing sustainability and environmental awareness programs. Gifts made this month; I will match dollar-for-dollar. All donations are tax-deductible.

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A Game Called Dead

Read: November 2021

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A Game Called Dead

by Michael Stephen Daigle

A Game Called Dead by Michael Stephen Daigle is the sequel to “The Swamps of Jersey,” the first Frank Nagler Mystery. Having read the fourth one – The Red Hand, I recently read the first one and thought this was an excellent time to read the second in this impressive deceptive series.

Reading the Frank Nagler Mysteries is rare when this reviewer knows the author. Mr. Daigle wrote this is the overview of A Game Called Dead.

Nagler is called to investigate the brutal attack on two women at the local college. It begins a tale of urban terror, which seems to be directed at Nagler and his associates.

The story introduces the mysterious terrorist #ARMEGEDDON, who taunted the police from cyberspace.

The story also digs deeper into Nagler’s past, especially the old Charlie Adams serial-killer case, and his relationship with Lauren Fox, who played a crucial role in exposing the political corruption in “Swamps.” She is back and steps into the front of Nagler’s life.

The story also introduced Harriet Waddley-Jones, a college dean, Nagler’s nemesis, and later ally.

Each book is a challenge to write a “better” book. In this case, I wanted tighter, faster action to develop a theme and flow to help carry the story. Sound and the description of sound are keys.

I also wanted Nagler to confront aspects of his past. Can he reconcile them, or will they always haunt him?

This reviewer’s opinion was a more substantial plot than the first book in the Frank Nagler Mysteries. Like all good mysteries, the suspense built page by page, and I figured out who the villain was late in the novel.

The one part that was difficult for me to read was the ending and the potential reigniting of the relationship with Lauren Fox. Having lost Jan, my wife, this year, I am aware of Frank Nagler’s pain in the first book about losing his wife. Ms. Fox only appeared in The Swamps of Jersey as a lost friend. I understand that some widows need to find love again to feel happy, which is not what I need or am seeking. The next book may provide some difficult moments on this topic, but I look forward to reading the next Frank Nagler Mystery.

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The Hero of This Book: A Novel

Read: November 2022

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The Hero of This Book: A Novel

by Elizabeth McCracken

The Hero of This Book: A Novel by Elizabeth McCracken is a searing examination of grief and renewal and a deeply felt relationship between a child and her parents. It is not a memoir but a remembrance of those we have lost. Ten months after her mother’s death, the narrator of The Hero of This Book takes a trip to London. The city was a favorite of her mother’s, and as the narrator wanders the streets, she reflects on her mother’s life and their relationship.

Thoughts of the past meld with questions of the future: Back in New England, the family home is now up for sale, its considerable contents already winnowed.

The following quote resonated with me.

I’ve always hated the notion, in life or in fiction, that the human personality is a puzzle to be solved, that we are a single flashback away from understanding why this person is cruel to her children, why that man has a dreamy, downcast look. A human being is not a lock and the past is not a key.

I highly recommend this book.

The Goodreads summary provides an overview,

The woman, a writer, recalls all that made her complicated mother extraordinary–her brilliant wit, her generosity, her unbelievable obstinacy, her sheer will to seize life despite physical difficulties–and finds herself wondering how her mother had endured. Even though she wants to respect her mother’s nearly pathological sense of privacy, the woman must come to terms with whether making a chronicle of this remarkable life constitutes an act of love or betrayal.

The Hero of This Book is a searing examination of grief and renewal and a deeply felt relationship between a child and her parents. What begins as a question of filial devotion ultimately becomes a lesson in what it means to write. At once comic and heartbreaking, with prose that delights at every turn, this is a novel of such piercing love and tenderness that we are reminded that art is what remains when all else falls away.


The Jan Lilien Education Fund sponsors ongoing sustainability and environmental awareness programs. Gifts made this month; I will match dollar-for-dollar. All donations are tax-deductible.

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