Spread the Light!

Estimated reading time: 5 minutes, 21 seconds

Everyday is Beautiful, and We Need to Cherish Life!

“Watch out, Maggie!” Joe exclaimed as his energetic dog jumped on my leg, threatening to muddy my clothes. Despite the interruption, I couldn’t help but smile at Maggie’s playful antics. I gently petted her head, feeling her soft fur beneath my fingertips, and told Joe that today was laundry day.

As we chatted, I asked Joe how he was doing. We had first met last November after Thanksgiving. While our initial conversation was brief, we both opened up about our aspirations to become the best versions of ourselves. The ongoing COVID pandemic has forced us to reconsider many aspects of our lives, from career paths to relationships.

Of course, for me, over the past year, I had made progress despite having lost my beloved wife three years ago, and the grief at times was still fresh in my heart but more often in the rearview mirror. For Joe, it was a realization that the path he had been on was no longer fulfilling, and he was seeking new opportunities and experiences. Despite our different struggles, we shared a sense of camaraderie in facing these uncertain times together.

Joe shared with me his experience of reading self-help books and how they have benefited him. However, he expressed frustration with people who try to offload their issues onto him. I could relate to what Joe was saying as I, too, had gone through a similar experience in February.

I empathized with Joe when he said, “They are pulling me into their rabbit holes. I already have a lot on my plate trying to avoid distractions, and I don’t need additional problems.”

We talked for a while to support and encourage each other, sharing our experiences and strategies for staying focused on our goals. By the end of our chat, we both felt more robust and more determined to keep on track.

Joe and Maggie were walking back home when Joe turned to me and said, “God bless you, Richard.” I responded to him, saying I needed as many blessings as possible this month as I had a significant birthday at the end of the month. Joe wished me a happy birthday, and I corrected him, saying it was still a few weeks away.

As we walked, another couple we had seen in Nomehegan Park passed us and greeted us warmly. They wished me a happy birthday, and I reminded them it was still later in the month. However, the woman in the couple spoke and said I had so much wisdom to share with everyone.

I considered joking about it being all BS, but I didn’t want to offend anyone.

Have a Nice Day!

As I made my way home, I decided to take a different route to avoid the flooded paths in the park. As I walked, I couldn’t help but dwell on the comment someone had made about my wisdom. It left me wondering what exactly they meant. If they had referred to me as friendly, I wouldn’t have given it a second thought.

I noticed a woman walking her dog as I approached the high school. Without thinking, I greeted her with a friendly “have a nice day“. She replied by saying, “It’s better than yesterday”. Although the sun was shining and the high temperature would reach the sixties, I couldn’t help but question her words. I responded that every day is beautiful, regardless of the weather. The woman agreed, and we both acknowledged the importance of making the best of what we have and helping others.

Spread the Light!

The crisp morning air brushed against my cheeks as I strolled through the desolate streets of Cranford’s downtown. Lost in thought, I reflected on the experiences that had shaped my recent past. Since the passing of my beloved wife, Jan, attending the Friday night services at Temple Sha’arey Shalom has become an essential part of my life. The comforting words of Rabbi Renee and, more recently, Rav Uri had helped me to let go of the painful memories that haunted me and embrace the peace of Shabbat.

As we gathered to light the Shabbat candles on Friday night, I felt the warmth of the flames enveloping my soul, filling me with hope. I couldn’t help but think of the Genesis commandment, “Let there be light,” which separated the day from the night. The light from the candles seemed to shine across the world, bringing a sense of peace and tranquility I had been yearning for so long.

As I traveled across North Union, something dawned on me: my simple greetings and reminders to enjoy life are more than empty words. They reflect the warm and uplifting light I experienced during Shabbat, a light that we are commanded to share with everyone we meet. Some people have criticized my cheerful phrases for years, dismissing them as mere silliness. However, I now realize that my words are not just meaningless platitudes; they are sage advice on living a joyful and fulfilling life while supporting and uplifting one another.

As I reached mile seven, my watch beeped, and I felt energized—with only half a mile left to meet this month’s exercise goal. With gratitude for the wisdom and peace I found during my daily walk, I danced like a butterfly, feeling alive and invigorated.


It has been almost three years since my wife passed away. As her caregiver, I lost my ability to greet people enthusiastically and encourage them to have a good day. Even though it may seem strange, I still believe that every day is beautiful despite the immense loss I have experienced. Moving forward one day at a time has been a significant challenge, but I have been making progress. My simple greetings may seem insignificant, but they are my way of spreading the light, being positive, and making a small contribution to repairing the world. I will continue to say have a nice day to those I meet. This small gesture has helped me when I felt like I couldn’t go on, and it has also helped others by sharing the light.


The Jan Lilien Education Fund sponsors ongoing sustainability and environmental awareness programs. All donations are tax-deductible.


Contact Us
Subscribe

Creative Commons License

This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial 4.0 International License.


2 comments add your comment

Share your thoughts and ideas

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

The Jan Lilien Education Fund!

The Book of V

Read: October 2021

Get this book

The Book of V

by Anna Solomon

The Book of V by Anna Solomon is a book that I may not have read at another time in my life, and I did find it to be a book that I could not stop reading.

Goodreads summarizes its plot.

Anna Solomon’s kaleidoscopic novel intertwines the lives of a Brooklyn mother in 2016, a senator’s wife in 1970s Washington, D.C., and the Bible’s Queen Esther, whose stories of sex, power and desire overlap and ultimately converge—showing how women’s roles have and have not changed over thousands of years.

Being Jewish, I knew the story of Queen Esther, although this version added new layers of the story that I did not know. The book’s illumination that women’s roles have not changed over thousands of years was something I knew but did not fully understand.

The three characters are very vivid and weave a story that is worth reading.

Lily is a mother and a daughter. And a second wife. And a writer, maybe? Or she was going to be, before she had children. Now, in her rented Brooklyn apartment, she’s grappling with her sexual and intellectual desires while also trying to manage her roles as a mother and a wife.

Vivian Barr seems to be the perfect political wife, dedicated to helping her charismatic and ambitious husband find success in Watergate-era Washington D.C. But one night he demands a humiliating favor, and her refusal to obey changes the course of her life—along with the lives of others.

Esther is a fiercely independent young woman in ancient Persia, where she and her uncle’s tribe live a tenuous existence outside the palace walls. When an innocent mistake results in devastating consequences for her people, she is offered up as a sacrifice to please the king, in the hopes that she will save them all.

I recommend this book.

Subscribe

Contact Us

×
Lincoln in the Bardo: A Novel

Read: August 2024

Get this book

Lincoln in the Bardo: A Novel

by George Saunders

My journey with “Lincoln in the Bardo: A Novel” by George Saunders began with recognition as one of The New York Times’ 100 Best Books of the Century. As I turned its pages, I was immersed in its profound exploration of living and loving in the face of inevitable endings. The book, which struck a personal chord with me after a loss, is a testament to Saunders’ storytelling prowess and a must-read for those interested in Abraham Lincoln.

February 1862. The Civil War is less than one year old. The fighting has begun in earnest, and the nation has already realized it is in for a long, bloody struggle. Meanwhile, President Lincoln’s beloved eleven-year-old son, Willie, lies upstairs in the White House, gravely ill. In a matter of days, despite predictions of a recovery, Willie dies and is laid to rest in a Georgetown cemetery. “My poor boy, he was too good for this earth,” the president says at the time. “God has called him home.” Newspapers report that a grief-stricken Lincoln returns, alone, to the crypt several times to hold his boy’s body.

From a seed of historical truth, George Saunders weaves an unforgettable tale of familial love and loss that transcends its realistic, historical framework. The story takes a daring leap into a realm that is hilarious and terrifyingly supernatural. Willie Lincoln’s journey in a strange purgatory, where ghosts mingle, gripe, commiserate, quarrel, and enact bizarre acts of penance, is a testament to Saunders’ imaginative prowess. The monumental struggle over young Willie’s soul in this transitional state, known as the bardo in the Tibetan tradition, is a narrative that will leave you spellbound.

Lincoln in the Bardo is an astonishing feat of imagination and a bold step forward from one of his generation’s most important and influential writers. Formally daring, generous in spirit, and deeply concerned with matters of the heart, it is a testament to fiction’s ability to speak honestly and powerfully about the things that matter to us. Saunders has invented a thrilling new form that deploys a kaleidoscopic, theatrical panorama of voices to ask a timeless, profound question: How do we live and love when we know everything we love must end?

×
Orbital

Read: December 2023

Get this book

Orbital: A Novel

by Samantha Harvey

Today, I started reading “Orbital” by Samantha Harvey. “Orbital” is a slender novel with epic power that captures a single day in the lives of six women and men hurtling through space. The author’s prose is poetic and impossible to put aside. Watching the Earth through the eyes of space travelers is refreshing. If I finish reading it by Sunday, it will be the 78th book I’ve read this year or the first one of 2024.

They are not going towards the moon or the vast unknown but are orbiting our planet. These astronauts and cosmonauts come from various countries, including America, Russia, Italy, Britain, and Japan. They are selected for one of the last space station missions before the program is dismantled. They have left their lives behind to travel over seventeen thousand miles an hour as the earth reels below.

Throughout the book, we catch glimpses of their earthly lives through brief communications with their families, photos, and talismans. We watch them whip up dehydrated meals, float in gravity-free sleep, and exercise in regimented routines to prevent their muscles from atrophying. We also witness them form bonds that will stand between them and utter solitude. Most importantly, we are with them as they behold and record their silent blue planet. Their experiences of sixteen sunrises and sunsets and the bright, blinking constellations of the galaxy are breathtakingly beautiful and surprisingly intimate. Additionally, we get to see the marks of civilization far below, encrusted on the planet on which we live.

It is a profound, contemplative, and gorgeous book that eloquently meditates on space. Moreover, it is a moving elegy reflecting our humanity, environment, and planet.


The Jan Lilien Education Fund sponsors ongoing sustainability and environmental awareness programs. For gifts made this month, I will match dollar for dollar. All donations are tax-deductible.

Subscribe

Contact Us

I receive a commission when you buy a book or product using a link on this page. Thank you for supporting Sharing Jan’s Love blog.



×
Happiness Falls: A Novel

Read: September 2023

Get this book

Happiness Falls: A Novel

by Angie Kim

I highly recommend reading Happiness Falls, a book authored by Angie Kim. The story is about a family’s search for their missing father, which leads them to question their beliefs and relationships. The award-winning author of Miracle Creek writes this thrilling and emotionally profound book.

“We didn’t call the police right away.” These are the first words of an extraordinary novel about a biracial Korean-American family in Virginia whose lives are upended when their beloved father and husband go missing.

Mia, the irreverent, hyper-analytical twenty-year-old daughter, has an explanation for everything—which is why she isn’t initially concerned when her father and younger brother Eugene don’t return from a walk in a nearby park. They must have lost their phone and or stopped for an errand somewhere. But by the time Mia’s brother runs through the front door bloody and alone, it becomes clear that the father in this tight-knit family is missing, and the only witness is Eugene, who has the rare genetic condition Angelman syndrome and cannot speak.

Happiness Falls is a gripping investigation that centers around a father’s disappearance and the intricate dynamics of his family. As the clock ticks, the family’s deepest secrets come to light, raising questions about love, communication, and the human experience. This novel is a thrilling blend of mystery, drama, and philosophical exploration, showcasing Angie Kim’s remarkable storytelling skills that garnered her numerous accolades for her debut novel, Miracle Creek. Through the family’s journey, Kim offers a fresh perspective on the missing person story, creating a memorable tale of a family that goes to great lengths to understand each other.


The Jan Lilien Education Fund sponsors ongoing sustainability and environmental awareness programs. Gifts made this month; I will match dollar-for-dollar. All donations are tax-deductible.

Subscribe

Contact Us

I receive a commission when you buy a book or product using a link on this page. Thank you for supporting Sharing Jan’s Love blog.


×
Interpreter of Maladies

Read: June 2022

Get this book

Interpreter of Maladies

by Jhumpa Lahiri

Interpreter of Maladies by Jhumpa Lahiri is an incredible book. Each short story is a page-turner that I will re-read many times. As Ms. Lahiri writes, “The question of identity is always a difficult one, but especially so for those who are culturally displaced, as immigrants are, or those who grow up in two worlds simultaneously, as is the case for their children.”

Since 2000, Interpreter of Maladies has been on my reading list. For what is a writer, if not an interpreter of maladies? Perhaps, I waited until now so that I would have grief to help guide me thru this collection of short stories. I highly recommend Interpreter of Maladies.

The Goodreads summary provides a concise overview.

Navigating between the Indian traditions they’ve inherited and the baffling new world, the characters in Jhumpa Lahiri’s elegant, touching stories seek love beyond the barriers of culture and generations. In “A Temporary Matter,” published in The New Yorker, a young Indian-American couple faces the heartbreak of a stillborn birth. At the same time, their Boston neighborhood copes with a nightly blackout. In the title story, an interpreter guides an American family through the India of their ancestors and hears an astonishing confession. Lahiri writes with deft cultural insight reminiscent of Anita Desai and a nuanced depth that recalls Mavis Gallant.


Subscribe

Contact Us

I receive a commission when you buy a book or product using a link on this page. Thank you for supporting Sharing Jan’s Love blog.

×
Living With Loss, One Day at a Time

Read: September 2021

Get this book

Living With Loss, One Day at a Time

by Rachel Blythe Kodanaz

Living With Loss, One Day at a Time by Rachel Blythe Kodanaz is the book I would recommend for anyone beginning or in the early stages of grief. It should be on the griever’s nightstand so they can start and end their day with reading.

Ms. Kodanaz has presented at my bereavement groups and has been an inspiration. She encouraged me not only to continue writing but also to share my thoughts publicly.

Usually, I only write a review once I have finished the book. However, this is a collection of thoughts for each day of the journey. Over the first weekend, I read up to the number of days since my wife died. Now I will read the daily message each day. When I get to the end of the year, I will start over.

There are many essential gems in the daily readings. The one for Day 9, Love Never Dies, jumped off the page due to my writings on the same theme.

Love Never Dies. Your loved one has passed away, but the love you shared has not died. The memories you created, the connection you built together, and your affection toward one another will live forever.

Embrace the love and cherish the memories, as they will always be a part of you remain in your heart.

There are at least a dozen others that I have earmarked for future streams or even the basis of future posts.

Subscribe

Contact Us

×

Discover more from Sharing Jan’s Love

Subscribe now to keep reading and get access to the full archive.

Continue reading