Jan, Jon and Richard

Family of Three

Estimated reading time: 0 minutes, 44 seconds

Celebrate JanToday is the anniversary of Jan and I becoming parents. It is a moment of happiness that positively changed our lives.

I had always wanted to be a father. Before Jon was born, when Jan and I spoke about having children, she would answer “someday.”

It seemed as if someday would never arrive. In early 1980, we talked about it again. Jan surprised me and said we should have a child.

When she gave birth to Jon, it was one of her happiest days.

My love for Jan increased when I handed our son to her. Love Never Dies!

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Jan, Jon and Richard

We Are Having a Baby!

Estimated reading time: 0 minutes, 44 seconds

April 1, 1980, the NYC Transit strike commenced. During the work stoppage, I had to travel to DC.

I rode my bike to Brooklyn Heights and left it at a friend’s apartment. I then walked over the Brooklyn Bridge and uptown to take the Path train to Penn Station. Fortunately, when I returned, the subway was running again.

When I arrived at our home on Sterling Steet in Prospect Lefferts Gardens, Jan greeted me with a hug and a kiss. “I was waiting for you to take the test.”

The two of us had big smiles after the test and, in unison, said, “We are having a baby!”

Jan, Jon and Richard

Waiting on The Times

Estimated reading time: 0 minutes, 44 seconds

I had not gone out Saturday night to pick up the Sunday Times as we knew Jan was close to giving birth.

On the way to the hospital at 4 am, I stopped the car in Grand Army Plaza to pick up the newspaper. I felt an urgency to get to the hospital, so I grabbed the first paper on the stack and returned to the car.

Jan asked if I had made sure all sections were there. I had not, I responded. She checked the paper while the car idled.

Jan was in labor for almost 12 hours. She never looked at The Times.

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Jan, Jon and Richard
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Jan, Jon and Richard
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The Spoiled Heart: A Novel

Read: May 2024

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The Spoiled Heart: A Novel

by Sunjeev Sahota

Today, I started reading The Spoiled Heart: A Novel by Sunjeev Sahota. Nayan Olak has been seeing Helen Fletcher around town. She has returned to live in the run-down house at the end of the lane with her teenage son. Though she seems guarded, Nayan cannot help but be drawn to her. He has not risked love since losing his young family in a terrible accident twenty years ago.

After Nayan’s tragedy, his labor union, a pillar of his community, became his refuge and purpose. It was his way of striving for a better and fairer world. Now, Nayan wants to become the leader of the union, a decision that sets the stage for a gripping conflict. His opponent, Megha, a newcomer, is a more formidable challenger than he could have anticipated. Nayan is now in a battle that could redefine his life and community. The differences between Nayan and Megha escalate and threaten the ideals he holds dear. He finds solace in his growing bond with Helen. Unbeknownst to him, their connection is not just a product of their present circumstances but a thread that weaves through their lives, holding secrets that could shatter them. The suspense builds, leaving the readers on the edge of their seats and eager to uncover the truth.

In one sense, The Spoiled Heart is a tragedy in the classic mold, tracing one man’s seemingly inevitable fall. However, it is also an explosively contemporary story of how a few words or a single action, which may appear careless to one person, can be charged for another, triggering a cascade of unimaginable consequences. It is a blazing achievement from one of Britain’s foremost living writers, a vivid and multilayered exploration of the mysteries of the heart, how community is forged and broken, and the shattering impact of secrets and assumptions alike.

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Dragony Rising: A Frank Nagler Novel

Read: September 2022

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Dragony Rising: A Frank Nagler Novel

Dragony Rising: A Frank Nagler Novel by Michael Stephen Daigle is the fifth and best Frank Nagler Novel.

Like many of us living in the Garden State, Detective Frank Nagler has seen his hometown of Ironton, NJ, undergo many changes over the past several years. Although I want to believe the level of scandal in Ironton is more fictional than typical. The author describes the scandals within the city’s government, the stench of its corruption embedded deep, rivaling the dank stagnant stench emanating from the old bog just outside town.

From the opening sentence, Dragony Rising was a page-turner. Every time I thought I could put the book down, it beckoned me to keep reading.

I highly recommend this book, especially if you like mysteries with a unique New Jersey focus. My only recommendation would be for the series to be named the Lauren Fox/Frank Nagler novels. Lauren is as much the brains of the operation as Frank.

I have read several Frank Nagler novels-A Game Called Dead, The Swamps of Jersey-and have been waiting for this one to be published.

The author’s summary provides a good overview.

Detective Frank Nagler is recalled from medical leave to lead an investigation into the bombing.

He finds a shadowy organization called The Dragony, whose roots go back to the early days of Ironton’s manufacturing and mining history, a history involving Nagler’s family in strange ways.

He also finds a decades-old conspiracy designed not just to enrich the Dragony leaders but to threaten the existence of Ironton itself.


The Jan Lilien Education Fund sponsors ongoing sustainability and environmental awareness programs. Gifts made this month; I will match dollar-for-dollar. All donations are tax-deductible.

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After Annie: A Novel

Read: February 2024

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After Annie: A Novel

by Anna Quindlen

I started reading Anna Quindlen‘s “After Annie: A Novel” today. Forty years ago, my wife Jan and I used to read Ms. Quindlen’s column “Life in the Thirties” in The New York Times, even if we didn’t have time to read anything else. We clipped and saved each column, which helped us manage getting older with children. I am reading “After Annie,” which is about how love can overcome loss.

Anna Quindlen, the #1 New York Times bestselling author of Still Life with Bread Crumbs and One True Thing, is known for her insightful wisdom on family, friendship, and the bonds that unite us. Her latest novel explores the power of love to overcome loss and adversity.

The story centers around the Brown family and their matriarch, Annie. When Annie suddenly passes away, the family is forced to navigate life without their beloved wife, mother, and friend. Bill, Annie’s husband, struggles to cope with the loss, while Annemarie, her best friend, must confront the bad habits she once overcame with Annie’s help. Ali, Annie’s eldest child, must take on new responsibilities to care for her younger brothers and father.

Although Annie is no longer physically present, her memory continues to guide and inspire those who love her. Her voice resonates in their minds, offering them comfort, wisdom, and clarity. Through the power of her love, Annie gives her family the strength they need to move on without her. They learn that even though their beloved Annie is gone, she will always be with them in spirit.

After Annie” is a poignant and touching story exploring the unanticipated ways adversity can transform our lives. With her signature style that strikes an emotional chord, Quindlen delivers a heartwarming tale about the tenacity of love and how it can triumph over even the most formidable obstacles. This story of hope is a testament to the enduring strength of the human spirit and its ability to rise above life’s challenges. It inspires us to believe in the power of love and its capacity to reshape our lives for the better.

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My Evil Mother: A Short Story

Read: April 2022

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My Evil Mother: A Short Story

by Margaret Atwood

My Evil Mother: A Short Story by Margaret Atwood was a free book with your Prime Reading membership. I have always enjoyed reading Ms. Atwood’s books. My Evil Mother was an enjoyable read and reminded me why she is a great author and why short stories are unique and special. As the NY Times described, My Evil Mother, is a bittersweet short story about mothers, daughters’ witches’ brew of love—and control. I highly recommend it as it is one of my best books this year. 

Goodreads provides a concise overview.

Life is hard enough for a teenage girl in 1950s suburbia without having a mother who may—or may not—be a witch. A single mother at that. Sure, she fits in with her starched dresses, string of pearls, and floral aprons. Then there are the hushed and mystical consultations with neighborhood women in distress. The unsavory, mysterious plants in the flower beds. The divined warning to steer clear of a boyfriend whose fate is certainly doomed. But as the daughter of this bewitching homemaker comes of age and her mother’s claims become more and more outlandish, she begins to question everything she once took for granted.

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Absolution: A Novel

Read: November 2023

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Absolution: A Novel

by Alice McDermott

I started reading “Absolution: A Novel” by Alice McDermott today. The opening line immediately grabbed my attention: “You have no idea what it was like. For us. The women, I mean.” In most literature about the Vietnam War, American women, particularly wives, have been minor characters. However, in “Absolution,” they take center stage.

The book follows the story of two women, Tricia, a shy newlywed, and Charlene, a practiced corporate spouse and mother of three. They both found themselves in Saigon in 1963, forming a wary alliance. They balance the era’s mandate to be “helpmeets” to their ambitious husbands with their inchoate impulse to “do good” for the people of Vietnam.

Sixty years later, Charlene’s daughter reaches out to Tricia after encountering an aging Vietnam vet. Together, they look back at their time in Saigon, carefully considering that pivotal year and Charlene’s altruistic machinations. They discover how their lives as women on the periphery have been shaped and burdened by the same unintended consequences that followed America’s tragic interference in Southeast Asia.

This virtuosic new novel from Alice McDermott, one of our most observant and affecting writers, explores themes of folly and grace, obligation, sacrifice, and, finally, the quest for absolution in a broken world.


The Jan Lilien Education Fund sponsors ongoing sustainability and environmental awareness programs. Gifts made this month; I will match dollar-for-dollar. All donations are tax-deductible.

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I receive a commission when you buy a book or product using a link on this page. Thank you for supporting Sharing Jan’s Love blog.



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The Pursuit of Happiness

Read: January 2025

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The Pursuit of Happiness

by Jeffrey Rosen

Today, I started reading Jeffrey Rosen‘s book, “The Pursuit of Happiness: How Classical Writers on Virtue Inspired the Lives of the Founders.” This New York Times bestseller examines what “the pursuit of happiness” meant to our nation’s Founders, how that iconic phrase influenced their lives, and how it provided the foundation for our democracy—a quest for being good rather than merely feeling good.

The Declaration of Independence identifies “the pursuit of happiness” as one of our unalienable rights, alongside life and liberty. Jeffrey Rosen, president of the National Constitution Center, profiles six of the most influential Founding Fathers—Benjamin Franklin, George Washington, John Adams, Thomas Jefferson, James Madison, and Alexander Hamilton—to explore what pursuing happiness meant to them. This work provides “the best and most readable introduction to the ideas of the Founders that we have” (Gordon Wood, author of “Power and Liberty“).

By examining the classical Greek and Roman moral philosophers who inspired the Founders, Rosen illustrates how they understood the pursuit of happiness as a quest for being good rather than simply feeling good. It is about striving for lifelong virtue instead of seeking short-term pleasures. Among these virtues were the habits of industry, temperance, moderation, and sincerity, which the Founders regarded as essential components of personal growth, character development, and self-mastery. They believed that self-governance in politics required self-governance on an individual level. For all six Founders, the pursuit of virtue was fundamentally incompatible with the enslavement of African Americans, although the Virginians failed to uphold their principles in this regard.

Ken Burns describes “The Pursuit of Happiness” as “immensely readable and thoughtful. It is more than just an analysis of the famous phrase in the Declaration. It is a revealing journey into the Founders’ minds, offering a deep and fresh understanding of the foundations of our democracy.



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