Jan and her Orchid!

Happy Birthday, Jan!

Jan's Transformative Love Will Never Die!

Estimated reading time: 2 minutes, 5 seconds

I woke up at half past five, as I have for the last third of a century.

“Happy Birthday, my love,” I announced while my eyes adjusted to the dim light of the new day.

My eyes turned to Jan’s side of the bed and realized that no one was there.

Looking at the Peace Lllly, I accepted that I was alone. I was tempted to rotate the plant to see the blooms, but I chose not to out of concern that the plant might end up on the floor.

Stumbling into my kitchen, I accepted that this would be the second Birthday since 1974 that I would celebrate without the love of my life.

Two year’s ago, at the end of hospice, I wished her a happy birthday, but I am not sure she heard me.

Last year, more than one hundred friends joined our family and the Hanson Park Conservancy volunteers to celebrate her life as we dedicated and broke ground on Jan’s memorial garden. Although it was the day after Jan’s Birthday, the final planting and mulching of Jan’s Memorial Garden was completed on April 25, 2023. The short video provides an overview of the garden.

What began as a desire to plant a tree to honor Jan has become a living memorial.

  1. One hundred seventy-three friends donated to purchase two memorial benches,
  2. Working with the Hanson Park Conservancy, we transformed the triangular garden at the entrance by adding flower beds and a wind sculpture for meditation, contemplation, and dreams,
  3. The final cost of the two benches was less than what was raised, and
  4. The balance was used to establish the Jan Lilien Education Fund, which will sponsor ongoing sustainability and environmental awareness programs.

My family and I will be forever grateful to all the friends who have helped make this dream a reality.

Although I will always miss Jan, her love, which transformed my life and others, will never die.

Happy Birthday to the love of my life!


The Jan Lilien Education Fund sponsors ongoing sustainability and environmental awareness programs. Gifts made this month; I will match dollar-for-dollar. All donations are tax-deductible.

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Jan’s Memorial Garden

Working with the Hanson Park Conservancy, we have taken significant steps in building Jan's Memorial Triangle Garden at Hanson Park including installing the Wind Sculpture.

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Jan and her Orchid!

Borthday Flowers for Jan

Jan's Transformative Love Will Never Die!

Estimated reading time: 2 minutes, 5 seconds

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The Jan Lilien Education Fund!

Jan and her Orchid!
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Jan and her Orchid!
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The Shadow King: A Novel

Read: April 2022

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The Shadow King: A Novel

by Maaza Mengiste

The Shadow King: A Novel by Maaza Mengiste is a book happened to offer two often overlooked threads of history. The first is Mussolini’s 1935 invasion of Ethiopia. The second one I am most interested in is the women soldiers who were left out of the historical record. I highly recommend The Shadow King. It is a gorgeously crafted and unputdownable exploration of female power and what it means to be a woman at war.

Hirut and Aster come alive in Maaza Mengiste talented writing. Their struggles to be seen as equal in a society at war is engaging. Hirut’s plan to create a shadow kingpin the absence of Emperor Haile Selassie is one that turns defeat into victory.

Goodreads provides a good overview of the book.

With the threat of Mussolini’s army looming, recently orphaned Hirut struggles to adapt to her new life as a maid in Kidane and his wife Aster’s household. Kidane, an officer in Emperor Haile Selassie’s army, rushes to mobilize his most muscular men before the Italians invaded. His initial kindness to Hirut shifts into flinty cruelty when she resists his advances. Hirut finds herself tumbling into a new world of thefts and violations, betrayals, and overwhelming rage. Meanwhile, Mussolini’s technologically advanced army prepared for an easy victory. Hundreds of thousands of Italians―Jewish photographer Ettore among them―march on Ethiopia seeking adventure.

As the war begins in earnest, Hirut, Aster, and the other women long to do more than care for the wounded and bury the dead. When Emperor Haile Selassie goes into exile and Ethiopia quickly loses hope, Hirut offers a plan to maintain morale. She helps disguise a gentle peasant as the emperor and soon becomes his guard, inspiring other women to take arms against the Italians. But how could she have predicted her war as a prisoner of one of Italy’s most vicious officers, who would force her to pose before Ettore’s camera?

What follows is a gorgeously crafted and unputdownable exploration of female power, with Hirut as the fierce, original, and brilliant voice at its heart. In incandescent, lyrical prose, Maaza Mengiste breathes life into complicated characters on both sides of the battle line, shaping a heartrending, unforgettable exploration of what it means to be a woman at war.

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Lone Women

Read: March 2023

Lone Women: A Novel

by Victor LaValle

As an amateur historian, I have always enjoyed historical fiction, especially when It helps us redefine the past to be more accurate. Lone Women: A Novel by Victor LaValle is a haunting new vision of the American West from the award-winning author of The Changeling. Blue skies, empty land—and enough room to hide away a horrifying secret. Or is there? I recommend this book.

When I began reading this novel, I was unsure where it was going or what might be hidden in the steamer trunk. I was unaware of this story and found this book a well-written account of forgotten history that must be told and shared with all readers. Stay the course as Lone Women: A Novel reveals the secrets in the Trunk and the fantastic story of lone women who lived in and prospered in the old West.

Lone Women is the twenty-fifth book I have read in 2023. Although I have surpassed my reading goal, I will continue to read.

The Goodreads summary provides an overview,

Adelaide Henry carries an enormous steamer trunk with her wherever she goes. It’s locked at all times. Because when the trunk is opened, people around her start to disappear…

The year is 1914, and Adelaide is in trouble. Her secret sin killed her parents and forced her to flee her hometown of Redondo, California, in a hellfire rush, ready to make her way to Montana as a homesteader. Dragging the trunk with her at every stop, she will be one of the “lone women” taking advantage of the government’s offer of free land for those who can cultivate it—except Adelaide isn’t alone. And the secret she’s tried so desperately to lock away might be the only thing keeping her alive.

Told in Victor LaValle’s signature style, blending historical fiction, shimmering prose, and inventive horror, Lone Women is the gripping story of a woman desperate to bury her past—and a portrait of early twentieth-century America as you’ve never seen.


The Jan Lilien Education Fund sponsors ongoing sustainability and environmental awareness programs. Gifts made this month; I will match dollar-for-dollar. All donations are tax-deductible.

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I receive a commission when you buy a book or product using a link on this page. Thank you for supporting Sharing Jan’s Love blog.



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The Pull of the Stars

Read: June 2022

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The Pull of the Stars

by Emma Donoghue

After Jan’s death and over two years of COVID, The Pull of the Stars might not seem like a good read for me. But I had placed this book on my to-read list a few months ago.  The Pull of the Stars by Emma Donoghue is set in 1918 in Dublin; a maternity ward at the height of the Great Flu is a small world of work, risk, death, and unlooked-for love. It was a page-turner that engrossed me at that moment. When I reached the last page, I wanted the story to continue. 

The details about childbirth, life, and death were riveting. All three of the main characters are ones that I could have imagined in an episode of Call the Midwife. That Dr. Lynn was a natural person underscores the depth of Ms. Donoghue’s research and writing skills. 

Julie and Bridie’s characters were so real it was difficult to believe that they were not also based on natural persons. 

I strongly recommend The Pull of the Stars.

The Goodreads summary provides an overview.

In an Ireland ravaged by war and disease, Nurse Julia Power works at an understaffed hospital in the city center, where expectant mothers who have come down with the terrible new Flu are quarantined together. Into Julia’s regimented world step two outsiders—Doctor Kathleen Lynn, a rumored Rebel on the run from the police, and a young volunteer helper, Bridie Sweeney.

With tireless tenderness and humanity, carers and mothers somehow do their impossible work. In the darkness and intensity of this minor ward, these women change each other’s lives in unexpected ways over three days. They lose patients to this baffling pandemic but shepherd new life into a fearful world.

In The Pull of the Stars, Emma Donoghue again finds the light in the darkness in this new classic of hope and survival against all odds.


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Ghostroots: Stories

Read: October 2024

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Ghostroots: Stories

by ’Pemi Aguda

Today, I started reading Ghostroots: Stories by ’Pemi Aguda, a finalist for the 2024 National Book Award for Fiction. This collection features twelve imaginative stories set in Lagos, Nigeria, in which ’Pemi Aguda explores the tension between our desire to be individuals and the influence of our past. One of the stories, “Breastmilk,” was shortlisted for the 2024 Caine Prize for African Writing.

The story “Manifest” depicts a woman who sees the ghost of her abusive mother in her daughter’s face, which leads to her daughter exhibiting destructive behavior. In “Breastmilk,” a wife forgives her husband for infidelity. Still, she later struggles with producing milk for her newborn, feeling like she’s failed to uphold her mother’s feminist values and doubts her ability as a mother. Things Boys Do” follows a trio of fathers who sense something unnatural about their infant sons, leading to their lives falling apart as they fear their sons are the cause of their troubles. Lastly, “24, Alhaji Williams Street” tells the story of a teenage boy living in the shadow of a mysterious disease that’s killing the boys on his street.

These stories in “Ghostroots” delve into the emotional and physical worlds, unveiling the profound impact of family, myth, tradition, gender, and modernity in Nigerian society. Pemi Aguda’s storytelling, infused with empathy and humor, showcases her as a significant new literary talent. Her deep understanding of human emotions and her thorough exploration of these societal influences will leave you feeling enlightened and informed, eager to explore more of her work.

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Study for Obedience

Read: August 2023

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Study for Obedience

by Sarah Bernstein

Today I began reading “Study for Obedience” by Sarah Bernstein. With a robust and lyrical voice, Bernstein thoughtfully examines themes of complicity, power, displacement, and inheritance. “Study for Obedience” is a finely-tuned and unsettling novel that establishes Bernstein as one of the most exciting voices of her generation.

A woman moves to her forebears’ remote northern home to be a housekeeper for her brother, whose wife left him. After arriving, strange events occur bovine hysteria, a ewe’s death, a dog’s phantom pregnancy, and potato blight. Suspicion towards newcomers seems directed at her, and she feels threatened. The hostility grows, and she fears what might happen.


The Jan Lilien Education Fund sponsors ongoing sustainability and environmental awareness programs. Gifts made this month; I will match dollar-for-dollar. All donations are tax-deductible.

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I receive a commission when you buy a book or product using a link on this page. Thank you for supporting Sharing Jan’s Love blog.



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Within Arm's Reach: A Novel

Read: May 2024

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Within Arm’s Reach: A Novel

by Ann Napolitano

I embarked on the journey of reading “Within Arm’s Reach: A Novel” by Ann Napolitano today. This poignant and insightful debut novel from the esteemed New York Times bestselling author of “Hello Beautiful” unfolds the story of a large Catholic family spanning three generations whose lives are upended by an unforeseen pregnancy.

Within Arm’s Reach” is a compelling novel crafted by Ann Napolitano, a bestselling author. The book powerfully captures our profound connections with loved ones, a theme that resonates universally, even when we struggle to express our emotions. The narrative, set in the context of an Irish American family spanning three generations, is a testament to the author’s skill in addressing deeply human themes. It’s another profoundly satisfying narrative from the author who previously explored grief in “Dear Edward” and the unbreakable bonds of sisterhood in “Hello Beautiful.”

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