Richard W. shared a post on May 5, 2023
Jan and Richard

Is My Heartbeat Dictating My Stories?

Words Flow Swiftly with Each Beat of My Heart!

Estimated reading time: 2 minutes, 18 seconds
Jan and Richard at YWCA Gala

Jan and Richard at YWCA Gala, October 2019

Whenever I feel my heart beating, I can’t help but write down my thoughts. Some are about falling in love with Jan, even when I thought it would never happen or might, unfortunately, end abruptly. Other articles are about dealing with grief and living alone but not being lonely. Whichever the theme, they are honest stories about love and life that I feel compelled to share.

Although I have always dreamed of being a writer, I know I am only a novice scribe. Perhaps I am only responding to my heart’s tearful cries? At times, the words flow so fast that they pile up like ice blocks once did in the Rahway River.

However, two years after my wife’s funeral, I have used words to express my deepest emotions and capture the true essence of love in my stories. Although we both knew before the first kiss that our love for each other would endure forever after the last kiss, the sudden loss has forced me to reevaluate our passion like a detective seeking clues to an unsolvable mystery.

When my writing captures the full measure of love’s beauty, it brings me immense joy because the power of love is immeasurable. It can heal, inspire, and bring meaning to our lives. Through my writing, I have found solace in expressing my deepest emotions and capturing the true essence of love.

As I ponder Viktor E. Frankl‘s profound words on love being the ultimate goal of life, I am grateful for the true love Jan and I shared, which will forever reside in my heart.

Sharing Jan’s love has been my salvation and the most precious offering I can make to those around me. Love can heal and bring light to even the darkest moments, so I cherish every opportunity to share it with my family, grandchildren, friends, and neighbors. Through my humble writings and sharing Jan’s, I aspire to encourage friends and foes to pursue love as life’s ultimate goal.

Without love, life would be meaningless – but with it, everything else falls into place. My stories will be my legacy, a testament to the power and beauty of love I can leave behind for my loved ones and community.

The Jan Lilien Education Fund sponsors ongoing sustainability and environmental awareness programs. Gifts made this month; I will match dollar-for-dollar. All donations are tax-deductible.

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Wedding Day

The Day Jan and I Married!

Our wedding day was a beautiful celebration of love and commitment, shared with our closest family and friends. The special memories we made on that day will always be kept close to our hearts, reminding us of the strong bond between Jan and me.
Richard W. Brown August 9, 2022

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Borscht Belt Boy: Recollections of a Hotel Brat

Read: January 2024

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Borscht Belt Boy

by Mark Kramer

I started reading Borscht Belt Boy: Recollections of a Hotel Brat by Mark Kramer today. The book is the story of a young man who grew up in the heyday of the Borscht Belt. The author sent me a copy when I shared my 2023 reading accomplishments. I found joy in reading his memoir as the author, and I are almost the same age.

The author, the son of a Catskills Mountain resort hotel owner, describes his experiences growing up when hotels, bungalow colonies, and sleep-away camps were booming. Learn about the characters that populated this world, from the kids who worked in the dining rooms, the handymen recruited from the Bowery, to the chefs and maitre d’s.

Enjoy the author’s humorous description of the different kinds of people who summered in the mountains. Read fascinating tales of entertainers, including Buddy Hackett and Lenny Bruce’s experiences at the family hotel. There is a brief history of Catskills’ institutions, how the influx of Jews changed the landscape, and how the resort trade influenced race, religion, and class.

This lighthearted memoir will return fond memories to those who visited the Borscht Belt in their youth and enlighten those not lucky enough to have shared this particular time and place in history.

The Jan Lilien Education Fund sponsors ongoing sustainability and environmental awareness programs. Regarding gifts made this month, I will match dollar for dollar. All donations are tax-deductible.

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The New Wilderness

Read: October 2021

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The New Wilderness

by Diane Cook

The New Wilderness by Diane Cook. The New Wilderness is a timely book and one that resonated with me. When Jan and I met in 1973, it was a revolutionary time with movements encouraging communes and returning to the farm. Neither Jan nor I were interested in living in a commune. Reading this book helped reassure me that we made the correct choice.

The summary of the book is:

Margaret Atwood meets Miranda July in this wildly imaginative debut novel of a mother’s battle to save her daughter in a world ravaged by climate change; A prescient and suspenseful book from the author of the acclaimed story collection, Man V. Nature.

Bea’s five-year-old daughter, Agnes, is slowly wasting away, consumed by the smog and pollution of the overdeveloped metropolis that most of the population now calls home. If they stay in the city, Agnes will die. There is only one alternative: the Wilderness State, the last swath of untouched, protected land, where people have always been forbidden. Until now.

Bea, Agnes, and eighteen others volunteer to live in the Wilderness State, guinea pigs in an experiment to see if humans can exist in nature without destroying it. Living as nomadic hunter-gatherers, they slowly and painfully learn to survive in an unpredictable, dangerous land, bickering and battling for power and control as they betray and save one another. But as Agnes embraces the wild freedom of this new existence, Bea realizes that saving her daughter’s life means losing her in a different way. The farther they get from civilization, the more their bond is tested in astonishing and heartbreaking ways.

At once a blazing lament of our contempt for nature and a deeply humane portrayal of motherhood and what it means to be human, The New Wilderness is an extraordinary novel from a one-of-a-kind literary force.

When I finished this book, I read Pompeii Still Has Buried Secrets by Rebecca Mead in The New Yorker. It reminded me of all of the threats to civilization that we face, who will be Pliny the Younger to be “the only surviving eyewitness account of the disaster.” Fleeing our cities for the wilderness is no longer an option!

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Shiner: A Novel

Read: March 2022

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Shiner: A Novel

by Amy Jo Burns

Shiner: A Novel by Amy Jo Burns was my twenty-second of the year, and I achieved my Goodreads 2022 Reading Challenge. An hour from the closest West Virginia mining town, fifteen-year-old Wren Bird lives in a secluded mountain cabin with her parents. They have no car, mailbox, or visitors- except for her mother’s lifelong best friend.

Wren’s narration of her discoveries of the secrets of the past over one summer drives the novel and makes it a page-turner. Her mother, Ruby, and her best friend, Ivy, are two strong women who dreamed of escaping the West Virginia mountains. The male characters play secondary roles in the novel, as they should. Shiner is a feminist book about how women can and must take back their stories and lives from men whose power is an illusion.

I highly recommend this novel and look forward to reading other books by Amy Jo Burns. It was the perfect book to finish my reading challenge. As I continue to read this year, I hope to find another of her books on my shelf.

Goodreads provides an overview.

Every Sunday, Wren’s father delivers winding sermons in an abandoned gas station. He takes up serpents and praises the Lord for his blighted white eye, proof of his divinity and key to his hold over the community, Wren, and her mother.

But over the course of one summer, a miracle performed by Wren’s father quickly turns to tragedy. As the order of her world begins to shatter, Wren must uncover the truth of her father’s mysterious legend and her mother’s harrowing history and complex bond with her best friend. And with that newfound knowledge, Wren can imagine a different future for herself than she has been told to expect.

Rich with epic love and epic loss, and diving deep into a world that is often forgotten but still part of America, Shiner reveals the hidden story behind two generations’ worth of Appalachian heartbreak and resolve. Amy Jo Burns brings us a smoldering, taut debut novel about modern female myth-making in a land of men-and one young girl who must ultimately open her eyes.

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Lila: A Novel

Read: April 2022

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Lila: A Novel

by Marilynne Robinson

Lila: A Novel by Marilynne Robinson is an unusual but believable love story. Although different than how I met Jan, this novel is about love and romance that, on the surface, should never have happened. Lila, homeless and alone after years of roaming the countryside, steps inside a small-town Iowa church – the only available shelter from the rain- ignites a romance and a debate that will reshape her life. She becomes the wife of a minister, John Ames, and begins a new existence while trying to make sense of the life that preceded her newfound security.

Lila is the third novel in the Gilead series. Previously I read Home, the second in the series, and Jack, the fourth. I highly recommend all three books.

Hopefully, one day I will read the Gilead and complete the series.

The Goodreads summary of the book provides an excellent overview.

Neglected as a toddler, Lila was rescued by Doll, a canny young drifter, and brought up by her in a hardscrabble childhood. Together they crafted a life on the run, living hand to mouth with nothing but their sisterly bond and a ragged blade to protect them. Despite bouts of petty violence and moments of desperation, their shared life was laced with moments of joy and love. When Lila arrives in Gilead, she struggles to reconcile the life of her makeshift family and their days of hardship with the gentle Christian worldview of her husband which paradoxically judges those she loves.

Revisiting the beloved characters and setting of Robinson’s Pulitzer Prize-winning Gilead and Home, a National Book Award finalist, Lila is a moving expression of the mysteries of existence that is destined to become an American classic.

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The Unsettled: A Novel

Read: October 2023

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The Unsettled: A Novel

by Ayana Mathis

I highly recommend reading “The Unsettled: A Novel” by Ayana Mathis. It’s a brilliant, explosive, and vitally crucial new work from one of America’s most fiercely talented storytellers. The story follows Ava Carson and her ten-year-old son, Toussaint, arriving at the Glenn Avenue family shelter in Philadelphia in 1985. From the outset, Ava is already thinking of a way to escape.

She is disgusted by the shelter’s squalid conditions, including a room infested with cockroaches, barely edible food, and an untrustworthy night security guard. She is resolute in her mission to rescue her son from the shelter’s dangers and humiliations and free herself from the complex past that led them there.

Ava and her mother, Dutchess, have been estranged for many years since Ava left her Alabama home as a young woman. Despite the miles between them, mother and daughter are still deeply connected. However, Ava finds it hard to forgive her mother for her sharp tongue, intractability, and bouts of despair that led to neglect and hunger during her childhood.

Ava wants to be a better mother to her son, Toussaint. However, when Toussaint’s father, Cass, suddenly reappears, Ava is drawn to his charisma and radical vision to dismantle systems of racial injustice and establish a new communal living.

Meanwhile, in Alabama, Dutchess is facing a difficult challenge. She is struggling to prevent the sale of Bonaparte to white developers, who are rapidly encroaching on the land. Bonaparte has been a beacon of Black freedom and self-determination, and it is now in the hands of its last five Black residents – families who have lived there for generations. Dutchess is fighting to preserve the venerable history of Bonaparte and the land, which she has worked hard to keep as Ava’s inheritance.

As Ava approaches Cass, Toussaint begins to sense danger around him. He worries about his mother’s erratic behavior and his father’s intense and volatile nature. Toussaint dreams of returning to Bonaparte and Dutchess, where he was born and raised. He hopes to find his way back there soon.

The Jan Lilien Education Fund sponsors ongoing sustainability and environmental awareness programs. Gifts made this month; I will match dollar-for-dollar. All donations are tax-deductible.

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I receive a commission when you buy a book or product using a link on this page. Thank you for supporting Sharing Jan’s Love blog.

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The Hidden Habits of Genius

Read: September 2019

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The Hidden Habits of Genius

by Craig Wright

The Hidden Habits of Genius: Beyond Talent, IQ, and Grit―Unlocking the Secrets of Greatness by Craig Wright, Ph.D., I got through my membership in One Day University.

Dr. Wright raises many important questions as he analyses fourteen (14) critical traits of genius. Professor Craig Wright, creator of Yale University’s famous “Genius Course,” explores what we can learn from brilliant minds that have changed the world.

What we often presume about a genius does not match reality. Among other interesting observations, Dr. Wright reminds the reader that Picasso could not pass a fourth-grade math test, and Steve Jobs’s high school GPA was 2.65. He questions why to teach children to behave and play by the rules when transformative geniuses do not.

Examining the lives of transformative individuals ranging from Charles Darwin and Marie Curie to Leonardo Da Vinci and Andy Warhol to Toni Morrison and Elon Musk, Wright identifies more than a dozen drivers of genius, characteristics and patterns of behavior common to great minds throughout history. He argues that genius is about more than intellect and work ethic and that the famed “eureka” moment is a Hollywood fiction. Brilliant insights that change the world are never sudden, but rather, they are the result of unique modes of thinking and lengthy gestation.

I found the book to be a fascinating read and raised more questions for future thought and reading. Professor Wright argues that the habits of mind that produce great thinking and discovery can be actively learned and cultivated. In the book, he explains how. He notes that reading the book will not make you a genius but can “make you more strategic, creative, and successful, and, ultimately, happier.

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