Half in Shadow by Gemma Liviero is an unforgettable novel about courage, love, and consequences at the dawn of World War I. In German-occupied Belgium, a tragic loss forces Josephine Descharmes to navigate dangerous new territory. By day it’s compliance, serving German officers at the Hotel Métropole. By night it’s resistance, working with her brothers underground to help Allied soldiers and civilians across the border into Holland. Both paths put her and her family at significant risk. This is one of the best books I have ever read. I highly recommend it.
Stream of Consciousness!
My random thoughts on Jan, love, grief, life, and all things considered.
Call the Midwife Holiday Special 2021
On Boxers Day, I watched the Call the Midwife Holiday Special 2021, without Jan. I had watched the previous season without her.
Christmas 1966 promises to be a memorable one. The Nonnatus House team is faced with their busiest Christmas Day ever as the Maternity Home is filled with pregnant moms and challenging cases. Luckily Mother Mildred is on hand to support the team.
The babies, the wedding, and the characters Jan and I had come to know made it enjoyable despite the tears. Love never dies! Grief surrounds me, but I must continue living and bringing Jan’s spirit with me.
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Life, Love and Grief
NPR’s All Things Considered did a piece on poetry and grief. After the Fire is was read, it reminded me that grief is our companion if we live and love. Is grief’s flame almost worth living for?
You ever think you could cry so hard
that there’d be nothing left in you, like
how the wind shakes a tree in a storm
until every part of it is run through with
wind? I live in the low parts now, most
days a little hazy with fever and waiting
for the water to stop shivering out of the
body. Funny thing about grief, its hold
is so bright and determined like a flame,
like something almost worth living for.
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All-Day WaterWorks
Mike produces a short holiday video about my grandchild. This year was just as moving and beautiful as the previous ones except in one addition.
This year, Mike dedicated the video to Grandma Jan. My tears flowed from my eyes as if they were permanently connected to a Super Soaker. I was unsure if or when I would stop crying.
Eventually, I did. I had the same reaction to the plaques on the benches when they were first installed.
I am OK with crying. I always have been. But, I need to gain control of the floodwaters before Jan’s birthday.
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Followers
Followers by Megan Angelo is one of NPR's Books We Love from 2020. The novel is an electrifying story of two ambitious friends, the dark choices they make, and the stunning moment that changes the world as we know it forever. Followers is a novel, but it could easily be read as history with all that has occurred with technology and social media. With the increased discussion of the Metaverse, how close are we to a significant spill of personal information? With the focus on followers defining our culture, how close are we to being manipulated by social media?
Let There Be Love and Understanding
Life’s storms can destroy the foundations of our lives. Our windows shake and rattle when a big rainstorm arrives. Jan and I often woke up at the crack of lightning and rat a tat of raindrops. At Shabbat Services, the Hashkiveinu melody and the lyrics would soothe our shared but shaken souls,
Peace, Joy, and Love
Today, I will attend The Boyle Family’s Peace, Love, and Joy lawn concert.
Last year Jan was weak from a year of Lymphoma treatment when we attended. Usually, my arm around her waist was a sign of my love for her. Last year it was to steady her as much as for affection. We both believed the worst was behind us.
This afternoon, I will stand alone. The guests will not see that Jan’s spirit is with me now and forever.
Love never dies; it only grows stronger.
May we all be blessed with Peace, Love, and Joy today and every day!
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